Houghton Street,
Holborn,
London,
WC2A 2AS
07931 374 391
The ViewLondon Review
You’re gay. But the thought of joining a bunch of tone deaf, sweaty-pitted, left-footed Becks boys in that pursuit of glandular relief known as gay UK clubland feels, like, soooo contrary to God’s will.
Yeah, you’re gay. Why therefore does uncomfortable confinement + shite hi-NRG/ pop drivel have to = fun? Well, it doesn’t. You don’t find Nelson Mandela celebrating his right to party on the popper-slippy podium at boyz-xxx-R-us now, do you? And if you like a nice meaty hunk in your club sandwich you’d be well advised, as a queer clubbing novice, not to touch this devil’s demimonde with a bargepole-sized butt plug.
The alternative? Something more exclusive perhaps? A la shadow lounge or naughty Norton’s sweet suite? Banquetted crackhouses running on the kinetic energy from Botox lockjaw, one and all. As wary as I am of that paper-thin contemporary credo which asserts that those ‘sultry’ South Americans can show us a thing or to about everything sentient, sensual and snack-foodstuff related, in this instance I’d have to agree. Exilio, you see, is as Latino as J-Lo in a flamenco skirt and chestwig; it’s also rammed to the shirt ruffles with gorgeous guys and girls pulling off some stylish footwork and pulling off… well, getting to know one another much better.
On a negative side, Exilio does what it says on its bulging packet. The crowd are 99.89% Brazilian, so probably best to douse yourself down in self-tango if your R-R-R-Ricky slick is more Gervais than Martin, unless paroxysms of self loathing are your idea of a fun night out, of course. Definitely one for Latino lovelies and lovers thereof.
Also, Latinos are not renowned for their snazzy sartorial style, so well-buffed ballroom shoes are the order of the day, and a few of this lot could give Simon Cowell a run for his money on the pushed up shirt sleeve/trouser altitude front. Still, it definitely beats the altitude problems on the rest of the gay clubbing scene.
Expect salsas, cumbias, merengues, cha chas, bossanovas – with a few Latino disco numbers from the likes of Ricky Martin and Madonna thrown in, basically your early 80s bontempi keyboard beat pallet come alive, sparky’s piano style.
Details:
9PM-3AM
Every other Saturday
£6