This bizarre corner of South Kensington is a kitsch slice of owner Janet’s slightly abnormal world, well worth a visit but don’t forget to bring your sense of humour!

The Venue
Located beneath the Brompton Hotel on Old Brompton Road, Janets Bar is a few moments’ walk from South Kensington underground station. Neon signs and a cartoon logo of Janet herself identify the venue from the street and provide an indicator of what awaits you within. Descend the stairs and you’ll find Janet’s personal collection of what can only be called junk masquerading as decor: Mickey Mouse balloons; mirrors with Dame Edna specs glued to the frame; unremarkable tennis racquets stuck to the wall; and fairy lights stretching their way around the room. It’s a disconcerting treasure trove (well, trash trove), with the best talking point being the framed photographs of glory days gone by, with patrons in various drunken states enjoying nights at the venue, and there’s an outdoor terrace when it all gets just too much.

The Atmosphere
Brash New York lawyer Janet opened her bar with an intention of making money, and unfortunately she and her staff are a little too strenuous in their efforts to achieve this goal. They circulate like vultures waiting for an empty glass, whip it away and demand you order another instantly or leave, which is certainly a pretty unique brand of customer service. That aside, the venue is a lot of fun with two live music performers every single night, and cheesy pop music entertaining the crowd of South Kensington locals and Sloaney regulars. Janet and her hostess make every effort to talk to the clientele, so don’t be surprised if single members of your party are suddenly and awkwardly introduced to other patrons in their efforts at playing Cupid. Weird!

The Food
As well as serving up cheap (ish – this is South Kensington) pizzas and burgers, Janets Bar keeps a stock of local takeaway menus for you to peruse, and will go and fetch sushi, Chinese and Thai meals among others for their patrons if the need arises.

The Drink
With a decent cocktail menu, Janets Bar sets itself from other local venues. Excellent mojitos with fresh mint are served up at around £7.50, with glasses of wine around £4 a glass and pints of lager at £3. The prices are pretty average for the SW7 locale so be warned, this means they’re on the pricey side!

The Last Word
There’s nowhere else like Janets Bar, and it’s worth a night here to marvel at the staff, decor and music – put your tongue firmly in cheek and it all adds up to a great night out!

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