Captain Haddock would be weeping into his mushy peas if he had the misfortune of suffering a meal at Faulkner's. From the Kingsland Road the restaurant looks pretty grand with it's branded awnings and a declaration of "prime quality fish". Inside there's a little quirky charm, wooden beams, a fish tank complete with fish (not the edible variety) and the walls are adorned with prints of ye olde London. There's certainly enough to entice and get you to your seat. That's where the fun ends though. The fish was expensive and bad. By bad I mean it wasn't flaky and fresh like good fish should be. Now, usually when you're let down by the fish the meal it saved by the batter, not so here. It was a deep orange colour, a similar shade to an oompa-loompa's face (the 70's version) and had all the crispiness and depth of a wet sock. So, when all else is lost the chips should save the day, not here. Crap chips are unforgivable when you're paying £1.50 for a tiny bowl. When you add that to the £14.80 for the fish, you'd think you were eating at Claridges. You're not, it's Faulkners - stay away from the plaice.

Faulkner’s is the place I go when I want to remember home, the smell of fish, chips, vinegar and salt carry me to memories of long ago, in a world where money was not a concern and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were still on the TV.

If you like fish, go to Faulkner’s, if you like chips go to Faulkner’s, if you like salt and vinegar, go and lick the window of Faulkner’s. Go to Faulkner’s!