A small patisserie just down the road from Stoke Newington railway, it doesn’t try hard to lure customers in with its dry-looking savoury window display.

The Venue
Patisserie Pastahane is just round the corner from Stoke Newington High Street on Northwold Road. The small patisserie easily blends in with the other shopfaces lining the one-way system so keep an eye out on your left if you’re tackling the traffic in your car.

No effort whatsoever has gone into the shop window to pull passers-by into the patisserie and the very few who do wander in won’t have much to choose from. The selection isn’t great by any stretch of the imagination but this patisserie isn’t about luxury. It’s more of a pit stop. Grab a quick bite, stick it in a paper bag and eat it while you walk. The table in the far corner is large enough for four individuals and is littered with the day’s newspapers. If you decide to eat in it’ll cost you extra and for the extra cash you cough up you’ll be sat with up to three people who you don’t know – not an ideal way to spend a coffee break but you’ll usually find the patisserie empty because it’s out of the way.

The decor is reminiscent of an old kebab shop. It’s very bare and feels rather empty. The tiled floors are dirty and the pale walls don’t do much to camouflage it. Interestingly, next to the table is a miniature door perfect for Dr Evil’s Mini-Me to walk through. It has two door handles, one on either side, which is rather bizarre.

The Atmosphere
The staff seem grumpy at first but by the time you leave they’ll be smiling warmly at you. With its location set just off the busy Stoke Newington High Street, few people venture into this patisserie making it a very quiet spot most of the time. The radio, however, plays music with lively beats. This isn’t the sort of place one would choose to eat in.

The Food
The savoury pastries in the window include Cornish Pasties and mushroom rolls as well as plain croissants. Most of the selection doesn’t look appetising in the slightest, making it quite difficult to make a choice for all the wrong decisions. Wander inside and the counter has a selection of chocolate cookies, muffins, cakes and doughnuts. It sounds great but it all looks very dull, boring and not very enticing. For 60p, however, the plain croissants are very tasty. Soft and fluffy like they should be, they even look good in the window.

The Drink
A selection of canned and bottled soft drinks including Coca Cola, Sprite and Lucozade sit in the fridge.

The Last Word
There are better patisseries on Stoke Newington High Street and they’re not far away. If you’re after a quick cheap croissant, however, and you’re passing by, then for 60p you can’t go wrong.

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