Luckily I had the chicken - I only went to the bathroom 5 times the following morning. My girlfriend had the duck and she spent the whole night throwing up.

The service was shocking - waiter snatched menu from my hand. Never once did they check on how the food was - probably because they know it's about the blandest, undercooked and worst Thai food I've ever had. If you live in the area, come to Wimbledon. We have Mae Ming, Mai Thai and Chang Thai all on The Broadway and all are heads and shoulders above this pile of dung.

AVOID. (unless you like food poisoning)

I have used this restaurant for take away on many occassions but my last experience was NOT good. I waited 1 hour and 40 mins for the food to arrive, the staff were totally disorganised and had no idea about my order. They did not call to tell us there were delays or any problems.A truly BAD service, DO NOT get takeaway from this restaurant! USELESS!!!!!!

I don't usually write reviews of restaurants but I felt compelled to for Thai Orchid. It is defintely the worse Thai restaurant I have ever been to worldwide.

At leat two dishes were cold. They did not have two of the key signature dishes of a thai restaurant - Papaya salad and sticky rice and the waiter even looked like he'd never heard of them when we asked.

The so called steamed rainbow trout was dry as a bone.

Everything else was just tasteless and really bland which is the last thing you expect from Thai food.

Along with a decor and music that could have been any kind of restaurant.

What made me really angry is the meal was almost £30 a head and that was without any alcohol and the place was pretty busy.

Classic Clapham!! I have heard very good things about Kao Sarn in Brixton so I will definitely be going there next time.

This resturant does decent food-but its all pretty average. First of all-don't orer two bowls of rice-i is enough for two people.
The chicken on bone as a main was plentiful and very tasty-however it was not as described (menu said chicken was coated i sticky sauce in fact it was grilled, like a better version of nandos)

the starters mainly consist of fish dishes, so not good if you dont like fish-however they were tasty, and a bit overpriced.
The duck in plum sauce was awful, with big stringy fat bits of skin hanging off the meat, if the skin had been crispy i wouldn't have minded, but it wasn't. The sauce was bland too
The desserts come pre made by another company and are frozen, apart from the three thai dessert dishes made my the restaurant. I had thai egg custard which arrived well after my partner had finished his dessert, which was coconut icecream in a real coconut shell-it was creamy and delicious.
My thai egg custard was piping hot, sweet and a bit too filling after a main meal, but great if u haven't ordered starters. It was sprinkled with lots of sesame seeds. The banana in coconut milk was just banana pieces put in hot tinned coconut milk and i can do that myself at fraction of the price so dont pay for that.
All in all for two starters, two mains, two egg fried rice, two desserts, and three cokes an one southern comfort and lemonade amounted to £58 inc £5.30 service charge. I did not tip as i object to tipping when paying service charge.
to summarise, immecable service, but food hit and miss, and make sure you ask for your dessrts to come all at once or youll sit there watching your partner eat.

Prices are reasonable. Thats where It ends. Save your stomach and money and leave. Food was just plain bad. And with stomach aches to boot. does not even taste like thai food. And there are no thai staff at all. Avoid

What a massive disappointment. I just went to Thai Orchid to get some takeaway food, after being away for the bank holiday. Didn't really have the money, but it's been a long day & I love Thai food. Turns out I would have been better off going hungry. We ordered prawn toast, chicken pad thai & beef stirfry with garlic, coriander & pepper. Took about 10 mins to wait & cost £21 - not too bad. That was the only ok thing about this meal however. The prawn toast was flavourless, and the pad thai was very bland - I ended up smothering it in lime (not supplied as you might expect), chilli flakes & even some soy sauce to try & give it flavour. The worst dish however was the 'stirfry'. Firstly it came with chicken rather than the beef ordered, and boiled chicken at that & tasted quite unpleasant. There was a little bit of onion & carrot & a greasy tasteless sauce. No hint of garlic or pepper or coriander - and it was more a stew than a stirfry. I am so disappointed in Thai Orchid, I felt the need to write a review immediately to try & save other people the money & horrible experience. Do not eat here!

I'd like to remove the one star in the rating above and give this place a big zero. I'm fairy easy to please but I generally like to give places with dreadful fast food a miss (which is why I don't go to Macdonalds). However, at least you KNOW you will get substandard junk at a fast food joint. You certainly don't expect it from what looks like a nice Thai restaurant on Clapham High street.
Starter: the greasiest, grossest 'fish' cakes ever. Cut them in half. Where is the fish? Instead its a ground up mush of a suspectly meaty consistency, with gristly bits in it. I am vegetarian. My dining companion was 99% certain he could taste chicken. I'd have liked to have seen the packet they came out of to check. I wish we'd left after that. Main course: decidedly greasy, average pad thai.
Service: Simply bizarre. Odd. Sporadic. And slightly confrontational. The bill: Service was added at the end despite appalling food and service. Then, just as we were paying, a glorious stink began emanating from the direction of the toilets. I paid them a visit. I don't want to talk about it.

Most worrying here, is that there is one review on this site where a customer has been to the restaurant 'on and off for ten years.' I am horrified it's been allowed to be open this long. I remain hopeful that it closes. Hysterically bad. I'd like to send round a health inspector. Or given that I am a journalist, I may just pass the details on to my food editor...

It was pretty cold when we got inside, but it was absolutely freezing outside. We stuck with it. Wrong. You see, we were given a drinks menu and seconds later were asked what we wanted. Mainly because the wine choice was so vague; "give us a couple of minutes," we said. Screw it, lets have champagne. We called the waiter over (he wasn't far away to be honest, lurking within sinister earshot). "we'd like to order drinks please, could we have a bottle of champagne?""yes. Red or white?" came the response. ". Wha? It's jus champ. Um. White thanks""yes""oh, and could we also get a couple of glasses of tap water?. Oh, you've gone"he had gone. Gone, it turned out, to get a more senior member of staff who could open a champagne bottle. Which we got. And drank from champagne glasses chunky enough to be used as hammers.

We never got our water, despite asking a few times."we'd like to order now please," I asked, expectantly "yes," the waiter walked off. Never to return. Someone else did instead."how many fishcakes to you get in the starter? Is there enough to share?""i dunno. Five""okay, we'll have one of those between us to begin with"they arrived almost immediately, fresh from some deep fat frying situation, dribbling oily nonsense. I was with a vegetarian. She didn't appreciate that the 'fish'-cakes were bulked out with some pretty nasty little lumps of chicken. We discontinued to eat them rather quickly. The main courses arrived soon after. I had a sort of nasi goreng, with a different name. Not expecting brilliant at £5-6, actually they weren't terrible. They weren't evil or life-threatening. Although I didn't dare go near the muscles, which didn't seem to have been cleaned properly, and definitely had a slight green tinge. Over-cooked squid. Some missing ingredients, mentioned in the menu but never quite made it to my plate. Like a fried egg. And thus the meal continued. I implore you: avoid like vermin

I went here last night (Tues) with two friends , it was quite quiet, food was quick and very tasty at a bargin price...nice restaurant i will definetelygo back.

Avoid this restaurant! The appetisers came within 30 seconds of ordering, always a worry! My prawns arrived with their poo tubes still inside, never a good start, and my girlfriend had to ask for cutlery! We were not offered a drink all night a part from when we arrived,and even that required prompting from us. My main can only be described as a car crash!what was meant to be crispy cod, arrived swimming in a disgusting oily swamp of random vegetables with a side of very slimy tasteless noodles! I proceeded to complain, and my main was duly removed from the menu, the highlight of the evening! To top off what can only be described as the worst meal I have ever had, they had the cheek to add a service charge!! What service! As with the main there was no way I was paying for this! Please do not visit the Thai Orchid, you'd be better off in McDonald's down the street! Awful!

After reading other reviews of this restaurant I decided to go on a monday night with my partner, as the service is supposed to be quicker than at the weekend. We stepped into an empty restaurant at eight o'clock, with no music and a faint welcome from the waiter. Determined to give the place a chance we sat down and after a while the waiter decided to play what I can only describe as party hits '89. This cd was repeated twice during our meal.

The food was good, but throughout the whole meal the waiter stood at the bar just behind us and watched us as we ate. Very off putting if not completely rude. The service was dreadful, they hardly said a word to us, and we felt very uncomfortable.

I left feeling like I had just spent £50 to be treated like an inconvenience rather than a customer.

I went to this restaurant on Saturday and I have to say the food was amazing. There were a few issues, Firstly me and my girlfriend called up earlier in the day and made a reservation for 2 at 2030 and on arrival I got the felling that no one really paid much attention to the call I made, It was only a short wait and we weren’t in a hurry so it was fine. I would definitely agree with the previous comments made about avoiding the appetisers and going straight in for the main. The food is reasonably priced I paid around £60.00 for two mains 2 desserts and a nice bottle of wine which came to around 20pound.all in all the food was amazing the service not so much , we had to ask for knives and forks to eat our meal and I was billed for four desserts instead of two , The bill conveniently rolled over and presented so I could only see the total cost...A ONE OFF MISTAKE SURLEY ?.Go here for the food but try and avoid Friday and Saturday.

This place is reasonably priced if you avoid the substandard appetisers... stick to the main courses and spend the rest on a glass of wine, you'll have more than enough food and enjoy the experience all the more for it.

It's not always the best place for service mind you, especially Fri / Sat, I'd go somewhere else, but it's a great mid-week desitination and the curries are really tasty!

THE OTHER DAY I WAS HAVING A DINER AT THIS RESATAURANT I MUST ADMIT THE FOOD WAS FANTASTIC AS WELL AS THE STAFF.
I WOULD DEFINITLY RECOMMEND TO ANY CUSTOMER WITHOUT ANY SECOND THOUGHTS!!!!!!!!!!!!

MILLAR

I have been going to this restaurant for on and off for over ten years now, and I have always thought it was generally ok, nothing special but reasonably priced, but tonight was definitely my last time.

I have to admit the food was good but the service was dire, but as we weren't in any hurry that didn't bother us. Unfortunately what happened next has made us decide never to go again; on the next table to us were a German couple who's English wasn't too good and as they were paying there was a bit of a discussion about the 'gratuity' on the new handheld 'Chip and Pin' machine. We didn't think much more until we received our bill and noticed that there was already a service charge added and lo and behold when the waitress eventually brought the machine for me to put in my PIN the machine was asking me for a tip. When I pointed this fact out to her no apology was forthcoming and I basically got the cold shoulder for even daring to notice their 'mistake'.

Good service should be rewarded, bad service should not be rewarded twice.