Battersea Barge offers something a bit different from the usual bars in Vauxhall, putting both drinks and live entertainment onto a boat on the River Thames.

The Venue
Battersea Barge can be difficult to find, a bit of a walk from the confusingly distant Vauxhall station. However, look for the Fed Ex building and follow the street to the water and you’ll soon see the surprisingly small barge moored on the river. You enter via a tiny walkway and inside you are met with a delicate stairway leading down to the heart of the vessel.

Inside, the decor is simplistic, with a few ornate touches accompanied by a faux red mahogany colour scheme. There’s a small range of beers but well stocked all the same, and also a few draught options. There are a series of wooden dining tables and chairs - basic but comfortable. The stage is the centrepiece of the barge, complete with an antique piano. The piece de resistance are two golden cherubs suspended from above, appearing to nod to the theatrical entertainment that frequents the venue.

The Atmosphere
People tend to come here for parties and events - the Battersea Barge isn’t the type of place you visit on a whim for a jar or two. As such, the atmosphere is relaxed and friendly. The tables are large and set up to maximise the opportunity for mingling with strangers and everyone is there to enjoy the acts and share in a sense of venturing out to have a fun evening. With different live acts and nights during the week, alongside private parties, Battersea Barge is all about the entertainment. It tends to be very good quality, amateur stuff on the whole. Who knows you may be witnessing the next Mark Ronson, Michael Buble, or David Gray before the hand of fame has nestled on their shoulder.

The staff are friendly and efficient, although they’re not really ever challenged as this place never gets filled to bursting.

The Food
The food at the Battersea Barge is basic. Expect hearty grub and all the typical Brit pub classics. Lasagne and chips, fish pie, sausage and mash, pastas - nothing overly inventive but good to fill a hole when out drinking. With all meals costing less than £10, it also works out pretty cheap for London, and the large portions are filling. It’s important to remember that this experience is not really about the food anyway. So sit back and soak up what else this little gem has to offer!

The Drink
The bar at the Battersea Barge is considerable in size compared to its surroundings, well maintained and serviced, consisting of a small range of bottled beers, draughts and popular branded spirits. There’s nothing overly exciting in the guise of entertainment - there won’t be any Tom Cruise Cocktail flair, but then there isn’t any room for that shenanigans.

As the bar’s literally only a couple of steps away from your table, best to avert your eyes as they say ’stage left’ and you wont miss any of the show while you wait for that well earned pint. Most surprising, as mentioned above, is the large array of draught beer available in such a compact bar, including Stella Artois, Castlemaine, Boddingtons, Strongbow and Murphys - all for around £3 a pint.

There’s also a good selection of bottles of wine - you find yourself wondering where they store it all! And very reasonable - between £12 and £30 for red, whites and roses and, if you want to impress, try the Laurent Perrier Rose Champagne for £70 (although there are cheaper Champagnes to choose from if you don‘t want to impress that much).

The Last Word
The Battersea Barge resembles a floating oasis in the heart of Vauxhall. Ideal for those looking for a different kind of evening and even more so if you want to experience some undiscovered talent, or just love your music.

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