What should have been a feast of Olympian standards turns out to be a greasy Greek tragedy.

The Venue
Moments from the Tate Modern, the Bankside location of The Real Greek seems to be its only highlight yet also its biggest problem. With reasonable prices and vast communal seating it attracts a bustling tourist trade which apparently does not seem to require such care and attention. The dining room is split into three sections each dominated by the central chrome bar and open kitchen. To the left houses cosy booths and separate smaller tables, and to the right sees the more sociable, communal seating area with a bank of long, tall benches, each crammed with a dozen chrome stools. The heated terrace has great views along the Thames and even on the coolest days fills up quickly.

The Atmosphere
This branch has all the atmosphere of a transport cafe. Slow, sullen staff with more bite than the chilli sauce they serve. Clientele includes baffled young locals thinking, Why oh why did we not go to Pizza Express instead?

The Food
Being the nature of mezze, the food is served as and when it's ready for the whole table to share. The flat breads are served warm, soft and plentiful with a good oily flavour. The accompanying dish of hummus is not the best example, dry and with no hint of the chilli-ness promised by the menu. The Melitzanosalata, a smoked aubergine dish, is delicious and without a doubt the most impressive of the selection. Pungent and fresh, flavoured with lots of garlic, herbs and a rich olive oil. On the other end of the scale was the grilled octopus, at £5.75 for a saucer-full, it is overpriced and very disappointing. Large chunks of rubbery octopi, coated in a gloopy slightly saccharine dressing, gave all the enjoyment of chewing tepid bicycle tyres coated in parsley-flecked diesel.

The Real Greek's specialities are the souvlakis. With a choice of pork, lamb or chicken they arrive wrapped in warm flatbread and doused in a creamy yoghurt dressing and tomato and chilli sauce. The pork is delicately flavoured with herbs but sadly the undercooked and gristly meat mean they definitely need a couple of pints of strong lager beforehand to really appreciate their kebab-ness. Plus the fact that they are wrapped in greaseproof paper only enhances the Friday night takeaway feel. Incredulously for a Greek restaurant, the Greek salad is a sad, limp affair, the wedge of creamy feta being the highlight, only to be let down by warm, clammy slices of cucumber and creping wedges of overripe tomato.

The Drink
The wine selection leans heavily towards the Grecian variety with the house white being quite palatable and at £12 a bottle, pretty good value. For a more traditional Greek experience you could try some Retsina, but considering in the homeland it is one of the more common and cheaper tipples, here the £16 a bottle price tag seems quite steep. The draft lager is Amstel but for a more authentic taste you could try the bottled Mythos or Keo.

The Last Word
The Real Greek is a great concept; reasonably priced Greek food served in a casual, communal setting. However, it needs to really polish up its act to keep customers coming back, as sadly it is no more inviting than a day-old doner for breakfast.

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